Is Trump Worse Than Obama?
It's time to face the facts Trump might be worse than Obama. This may anger you dear readers but the hard numbers don't lie. Here are the...
Minions, Communist Propaganda?
While using our patented mind enhancing sauce* one of our brave researchers uncovered a secret communist ploy. The lovable Minions are...
Move Over Jeb Gary Johnson has a New Best Friend
In a shocking turn of events Gary Johnson has left Jeb Bush for a cooler friend, Kanye West. Gary and Kanye first met while both men were...
Apparently You Still Have to Pay Taxes Even if You Don't Believe in Them
This is bullshit, the IRS is auditing me over "tax fraud". The Libtard Globalists at the IRS claim that you have to pay taxes even if you...
Guys, Gary Doesn't Understand what a Bird is
While eating with the boys at Dennis Chavez Elementary School, Gary Johnson revealed an interesting fact about himself. The boys started...
Jeb Bush likes Sonic the Hedgehog Way too Much.
Jeb Bush has a new obsession after his wife Columba Bush told him he can't, "play addicting games all night." Jeb has chosen to become a...
Gary Johnson Doesn't believe in Geese
While holding and being surrounded by geese Gary Johnson made a bold statement. "Geese aren't real" Gary said while holding a goose....
Gary and Jeb are Stockpiling WarHeads
In a Shocking turn of events, US intelligence agencies have confirmed that Gary Johnson and Jeb Bush are secretly stockpiling WarHeads....
Is Gary Johnson the Muffin Man?
On Sunday hundreds of residents of Spokane Washington reported finding muffins in their mailboxes. After a ten minute Bing search our...
Confession: I Don't Actually Know What Taxes Are...
It's time I came clean, America. For too long I've remained silent about my shortcomings as a journalist. As a reporter, you readers...
