Gary Pledges to Fix Unemployment Among 6-12 Year Olds
Finally, someone is here to speak out against the real issues. In an impromptu speech while waiting in line for a Cinnabon, Gary made a promise that no other politician has had the gall to make.
"My fellow Americans, for too long we have overlooked one of the most disenfranchised groups of our pretty good nation - our youth."
The speech was met with uncomfortable stares, but Gary went on:
"I feel that it is our duty, no, our privilege to put our children to work. We've gotten soft, America. We've become so ingrained in "PC culture" that we won't even let our red-blooded, patriotic children work in our red-blooded, patriotic coal mines."
