Shocking: Gary Promotes New Libertarian Empowerment Campaign "Breakaway Gary"

Gary, reeling from the latest news about his tooth infection, addressed supporters at a wafle house late last night, "today, we announce a pro-growth, pro-America, pro-libertarian empowerment campaign" he said. The focus will be on stoping the trend of libertarian breakdowns--similar to the breakdown Gary suffered in the 2016 election.

It's not clear how Gary plans to continue pitching the campaign. And, it's unlikely his supporters will be able to garner enough energy to get out of bed and vote. But as Gary always says, "as long as we're having fun, we don't have to win!"

Sources, however, tell Tax Free Sheep that Gary is expected to continue his nationwide wafle house tour by hitting key libertarian demographics like 'unlikely to vote,' 'recent college grad' and 'marijuana enthusiast.'